.: tisa or tisyonk?? :.

Monday, February 25, 2008

It was just a chit chat while having lunch with colleagues : 2 singles (me & a friend of mine), 2 pregnant women & 1 young mom.

The trigger was when those 2 pregnant women talk about their pregnancy. Since I’ve never been pregnant before (of course laaaa….need to have husband first to get pregnant my dear… :P), I didn’t talk much. But when they started talking about having nanny & more maids, I couldn’t hold it anymore not to speak.

For me, there’s nothing wrong of having nanny or maid or both. But it doesn’t mean that full authority is given to them. Their role is to HELP you as your second hand, NOT to replace you. It’s quite sad to see kids are closer to their nanny than to their mom. I feel sorry as well for children whose mom don’t know what their 1st spoken word is…when their 1st step is..or any other details. It may seem simple…or for some people, it’s simply just nothing. But for me, anything related to children, mom should be the 1st person who knows it.

Many friends of mine say that we shouldn’t be bother of taking the details of our kids, since…they’re just the kid….who don’t remember the details…so what’s the point of having nanny?? Again, I disagree. Children are more than just the living creature who come out of woman’s womb. If you want to have qualified children based on your standard, then you should be the one who raise them. If you leave them to their nanny or maid, then they will grow up based on the nanny’s or maid’s standard. Not that I underestimate the role of nanny or maid. But, Im sure everybody will agree that we should give our best shot when in comes to “create” on what kind of person our children would be like, rite???

I had never expected that my colleagues would laugh out loud at me (believe me…their laugh was really laugh!!!). They said that my profile is totally not suiting my words I just said. They’re picturing me of having “gadget nanny”. So when I want to see my children from office, I just simply have video call. When my children cry, I should put ipod on them. To avoid them for being annoying on me, I just buy them laptop to browse internet. They said they never had though that I’m actually an old school woman. Hahahaha!!!

I might be an old school mom. I admit, I used to think that someday I would be a full house wife like my mom. It’s just cool of being super mom who always be there 24 hours for their children & cooking often (considering “eat” is mi middle name :P). But along the way, I realize that giving up job (I prefer to call it “job” than “career”…”career” sound more arrogant :P) to make 24 hours dedication to a family is not an easy thing to do….especially, when we know that we as women have the capabilities, skills & knowledge. I know… I might sound as an ordinary urban ambitious girl. But being ambitious doesn’t mean we neglect the nature role of being a woman. Do not be deceived by the word of “ambitious”. We should pay more attention on “toward which matter” the ambition sense in channeled to. Instead of channeling the ambitious sense to ”finish the workloads on time”, why don’t we use it to “find out how to raise the children to be a qualified person” J. As for me, once we have children, priority of life will be automatically change. Office workload is just secondary playground. The main job is to be there for the children.

Nevertheless, I do afraid that I couldn’t be a mom who able to put strong good value in my children in facing life which is not always friendly. Really hope that someday when I have children, they’re much2 stronger than their mom J. Hence, religion is very fundamental issue in raising children. So they will know who to run to & what their guidance is when they’re encountering difficulties in life. No…they shouldn’t run to me as I don’t have eternal life to always guard them. They should know at the first place that they should run to Him & Qur’an is the guidance.

The conversation ended with my friend saying…”aiiyoo Tisaaa...stop talking!!! You’re busy talking about what kind of mom you will be that makes you forget the most important requirement of having your own children..have a husband first laaa!!!!”. HAHAHAHA!!!!

PS:
Suddently I miss my mom….A LOT….

4 comments

4 Comments:

At 1:21 AM, Dendi said…

tulisan lo yang paling panjang nih..
semoga bisa menjadi ibu yang baik, tisa.
ditunggu undangannya.. heuheehueh
At 1:27 AM, Dendi said…

and i believe you will be a great mom.. :)
At 1:29 AM, Dendi said…

sekalian ya.. biar tiga beturut
At 11:59 AM, tisa said…

Maaf Den, untuk edisi today, mangkok cantik hanya untuk yg posting 5 kali berturut-turut.
Try again next time yaahh...xixixixi... :P